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The thing about being a Type A overachiever is that we're masters at setting goals. Annual goals, monthly goals, daily to-do lists. More goals equals more worth, right? At least that's what we tell ourselves. We're in constant motion, barely pausing to take a breath after one success before our eyes dart to the horizon, searching for the next mountain to climb. Never enough time to get comfortable or bask in the glow of achievement. There's this constant forward motion (is it fear?) that propels us ahead while keeping us feeling perpetually unworthy – even though we've already done so much.
I caught onto this pattern years ago. This compulsion to constantly launch myself toward "future me" while never really sitting with present me. The way I'd squirm in stillness. How I'd brush off praise or skip celebrating how far I'd come. Because deep down, there was this terrifying thought: what if that was it? What if I never accomplished another "worthy" thing again? Never mind that I hadn't stopped to define what "worthy" even meant, or question whose definition of worth I was subscribing to. Society's? It certainly wasn't my own.
The real kicker? This constant forward motion wasn't just exhausting – it was robbing me of the joy in my achievements. Every milestone became just another checkpoint, every success just a stepping stone to the next thing. I was living in a perpetual state of "not quite there yet," even as I was accomplishing things I'd once only dreamed about.
I knew something had to change. I needed to learn to recognize – really recognize – how far I'd come.
So years ago, when I was running my own business, I started practicing something that transformed my perspective: the annual reverse bucket list. (Major shoutout to my friend, Sophia Bera, who introduced me to this game-changing idea.) It's a way to celebrate the wins and successes. To remind myself of what I HAD accomplished and the distance I'd already traveled. Every year, I make this list for myself. I include the big things and the small victories. Professional wins, personal growth, mental health achievements. Not just the quantifiable successes, but the qualitative ones too – how I feel, who I've become.
During my and Neela's first year as Co-CEOs, I added "met Harrison Ford" to my list. Because honestly – who wouldn't count that as a win? And now I have a platform to share about it. Harrison Ford. Seriously. And no, there aren't any pictures as proof because we refused to be that uncool.
But I digress.
Beyond meeting Indiana Jones, the reverse bucket list has become my way of celebrating and taking that extended pause so many of us resist. I deliberately set aside time, diving deep into my calendar, emails, project lists, and Trello boards, journals and more. Yes, it's an investment of time, but it's time spent honoring what's been accomplished. It provides space to reflect on the impact of each item. To curate what I want to remember and add to the annual collection of memories and achievements.
This practice isn't just about celebrating wins. It's about recalibrating our relationship with success itself. It's about learning to find value in the journey, not just the destination. About recognizing that our worth isn't tied to our next achievement, but to the sum of our experiences, our growth, and the lives we touch along the way.
Sometimes I'll look back at lists from previous years and find myself surprised by things I'd completely forgotten about. Challenges that seemed insurmountable at the time but are now just another story of perseverance. Victories that felt small in the moment but were actually significant turning points. It's a powerful reminder that we're constantly growing, evolving, and achieving – even when it doesn't feel that way in the day-to-day rush.
Life is short, isn't it? When we get to the end, we're not going to wish we'd spent more time obsessing over our to-do lists. We're going to reflect on our experiences. The joys. The struggles we overcame. Those rock-bottom moments we clawed our way back from. The lives we touched. The way we made people feel. The way we felt.
So please, take the pause. Take the time to curate your list. You've done more than you think, and those achievements deserve to be celebrated.
Related: Rebuilding After the Fall: Strategies for Rising Stronger