Remember that old parable about the sun and wind and the guy in the coat?
In a battle to get the coat off, the wind comes in all blustery and cold. And the guy only pulls his coat tighter. Then the sun shines and the coat comes off – and the lesson, ostensibly, is for the wind. You know – you get more results with warm shine than fierce blow.
Or something.
But lately I’m thinking there’s another lesson in there. And it’s for the coat-wearer. Which is all of us these days – leaders in particular.
We’re clawing our way through all sorts of conditions in the workplace. A leader’s day-to-day can feel like a blizzardy tornado of a hurricane.
And I’m watching leaders pull their coats on tighter. You know – fighting to overcome the conditions. But I think it may be time to loosen the grip. To stop fighting the intensity of the moment and start shifting how we respond to it.
As the metaphorical, organizational winds keep blowing harder, leaders come to me seeking tips on tightening their grip.
And I want them to see they’re fighting the wrong battle. It’s not about holding harder to that coat. It’s about letting the wind become the sun and letting in warmth and ease where ferocity’s been reigning.
Leaders, you're doing the wrong job. And when we can right your understanding of what you’re being called to do, you’ll find yourself ready if not to remove the coat then at least to undo the top few buttons.
So where do we begin? With a reset.
1. Your job isn’t to know all the answers. It’s to cultivate them.
As in, life’s gotten complicated. Change and chaos are swirling inside and outside your organization.
So please. Please don’t be the person who thinks they not only can – but should – figure it all out in service of inspiring confidence in your team.
No. Be the person who takes accountability for scanning the landscape, taking in the context, and knowing the right questions to ask.
And then – start asking.
Members of your team see and know and understand things you don’t. “Knowing” everything is a big job. So spread that responsibility.
Ask great questions, listen well, honor new ideas and insights. Whatever is happening –whatever your team needs to change or deliver – let the collective insights be the wisdom you follow together.
2. Your job isn’t to bake a foolproof plan. It’s to bake agility into the plan.
Know how you did all the research, collected the facts, the data, the customer insights, and now you have everything you need to build a foolproof plan?
Said no effective leader ever!
Things are changing – so rapidly and constantly – that the most intelligent plans are the ones that account for this.
That take an agile approach – that plan in short bursts, use experimentation to confirm or deny an hypothesis, and keep pivoting and getting smarter real-time.
3. Your job isn’t to make people happy. It’s to trust them with the truth.
Repeat after me. Your team is not your family. The belief that it is, is one of the most dangerous out there.
We are all adults in a workplace. As a leader, be kind. Be empathetic.
The truth of a plan or a change may not be one everyone will be personally excited about.
And your job is not to deliver joy – but truth and transparency.
Connect with your team. Hear their needs and concerns. And also, stop shielding them from hard things.
Your leadership should not be judged on their pleasure, but on their clarity around what is expected of them. Let them know what’s coming and how they can contribute. And then let them decide if they’re on-board.
4. Your job isn’t to offer certainty but to build resilience.
We’re in a crisis of trust. Driven by many factors – one of which is leaders trying to offer assurances that just aren’t assurable.
But there’s good news and it’s this: When we ask and listen to ensure we’re all having a shared, inclusive conversation. When we allow humility, fallibility into our plans that we can course-correct. When we give people their due respect by showing them the truth without sugarcoating.
All of this builds their resilience. Lessens the need for certainty. Builds the collective readiness to tackle what’s coming.
This is the brand of leadership the sun can get behind. So loosen that coat and lean in.