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Let’s get straight to the point: Do you understand one of the most uncomfortable truths about predictable referrals for serious professionals? Here it is: the more difficult, the more effort, and the more risk associated with making any type of introduction, the less likely it is to occur. This concept is at the heart of my latest book, Can I Borrow Your Car?, which focuses on lowering perceived and actual risk in the referral process.
The Lamborghini Analogy
Imagine this scenario: you want to borrow my Lamborghini. I have several — figuratively speaking — and when I ask where you’re taking it, you tell me you’re going on a three-day off-road adventure filled with potholes and dangerous drivers. That’s a big ask. Chances are, I’m going to say no. Why? Because the risk feels too high.
This same principle applies to referrals. If introducing a person to you feels risky — whether because of perceived effort, uncertainty, or potential fallout — the likelihood of that introduction happening plummets. So, how do you reduce perceived risk and make introductions effortless? Let’s dive in.
Be Worth Meeting — Even When They Don’t Need You
The simplest way to lower referral risk is to ensure you’re worth meeting even when your ideal prospect isn’t actively seeking your services. Sure, when someone needs your expertise — whether as a financial advisor, consultant, or business owner — you can confidently answer questions and describe your offerings. But here’s the real question: Are you worth meeting when they already have an incredible advisor or supplier? Being worth meeting goes beyond your professional credentials. It’s about being someone people want to know — someone who brings value, interest, and energy into their lives regardless of whether they’re buying from you.
The Fly Fishing Example
A perfect example happened just an hour ago. My good friend Mike Hook introduced me to someone who runs CEO groups in my region. Now, I didn’t know this individual personally, but Mike mentioned one magical phrase: fly fishing. That was all it took for me to say yes immediately. Why? Because fly fishing is one of my passions. Worst case scenario? We’d talk about fly fishing—a low-risk, high-reward introduction.
This illustrates a key point: when you share a passion outside of work, you become easier and safer to introduce. People feel confident that even if there’s no immediate business connection, there’s common ground that makes the introduction worthwhile.
The Power of Passion
Here’s the uncomfortable truth: if you don’t have something outside of work that lights you up — something you’re passionate about — you may come across as less interesting. This isn’t a judgment; it’s an opportunity for growth. Sharing your passions makes introductions frictionless because people who share those interests will naturally look forward to meeting you.
Whether it’s fly fishing, growing orchids, adventure travel, or collecting impressionist art, your passion becomes your secret weapon for networking at a higher level. It makes you more engaging and memorable, and ultimately safer to introduce than someone who only talks shop.
Living Life with Intention
Even if your passion doesn’t align with someone else’s interests, it still adds depth and humanity to your interactions. People might chuckle and say, “I heard you’re obsessed with fly fishing,” or they might ask why it excites you so much. Either way, they see you as more than just a business owner or salesperson — they see someone living life with intention and purpose.
And here’s the real secret: your passion doesn’t have to be important; it just has to be yours. It’s not about impressing others; it’s about being authentically yourself.
A Call to Action
If you don’t have a passion or feel disconnected from what once brought you joy, now is the time to reflect. Think back on what used to excite you before life got busy with success and responsibilities. What hobbies or interests did you set aside? What have you always wanted to try?
Maybe it’s canoeing — rent one and give it a shot (safely). Maybe it’s fly fishing — connect with me; I’d love to help get you started. Whatever it is, take action today. Pursue something that lights you up and share those experiences with your network. When people see what excites you outside of work, they’ll find introducing you effortless and even enjoyable.
Final Thoughts
Referrals aren’t just about business; they’re about connection. By lowering perceived risk and sharing what makes you unique as a person, not just as a professional, you’ll make introductions seamless and predictable. So go out there and live boldly, and let your passions pave the way for deeper relationships and more referrals.
That’s today’s focus: make yourself easy — and exciting — to introduce!
Related: How Advisors Can Get More Referrals—Without Feeling Pushy or Salesy