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Here’s an un-mathematical equation defining confidence:
Acknowledgment of daily successes + Having a clear vision of your goals = Belief that you will succeed
Why is this profound? Perhaps because many of us have assumed that confidence is something instinctual or strictly genetic….something that you are either born with or without, leading to such preposterous assertions as “I’m just not a confident person.” When you understand the formula for confidence, which prominently includes what I like to term the “at-a-girl factor”, or, the consistent acknowledgement of one’s little successes, it becomes clear that despite the genetic connection, confidence is a state of being that we can all experience. This cycle is self-fulfilling; the more successes you compile, the surer you are about future successes. But we must take the liberty to grant success to ourselves. An additional incentive to celebrate is remembering that the brain cannot chemically tell the difference between small successes like repairing your eyeglasses and huge milestones like earning a PhD.
Let’s Look At The Numbers
During a professional workshop I facilitated last week, I took a poll that revealed the following rough statistics about the at-a-girl factor: 27% celebrate their everyday successes while 53% only celebrate the very big successes. 18% have celebratory intentions but admit they never get around to it, where 7% believe they have nothing to celebrate in their careers.
While the 27% segment seems like too small a minority for their own good, it still manages to prove that the confidence mindset is indeed achievable for the rest of us. It’s simply a matter of stimulating action within ourselves. Many DRIVEN professionals like you and me tend to be inherently hard on ourselves; we take responsibilities seriously and perpetually feel like we’re not doing enough. This can sometimes equate to a sense of not “being” enough. I mean, c’mon? Would you ever speak to a friend, family member or colleague as harshly and downright critically as you would tear your own self apart? Well, it’s time to change all that through a celebration of the small stuff. To get there, get ready to employ a little neuroplasticity, or, what some of us call “positive brainwashing”. Once achieved, you can turn your inner critic into your biggest fan !
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Keep An Eye On The Prize
Have you ever noticed that when you learn a new word, you suddenly begin to hear that word 6 times a day in conversation? How about the last time you bought a new car, and immediately started noticing how many other cars just like yours are on the road? The point is, we tend to see what we’re thinking about. This phenomenon can be applied intentionally to success, and to building the confidence necessary to achieve it time after time. Think about it: You are the only one who can truly imagine your goals. If you “keep an eye out” for success, you’ll begin to notice it’s everywhere, just waiting to be claimed by you. Practice making this a perpetual state of mind, and before you know it, you’ll have brainwashed yourself confident!
Hit Pause
Personal success hasn’t completed its cycle until you stop for a moment to reflect upon it. Finding time to pause and celebrate your everyday successes will prompt you to discover that you have more than you realize. Your inner critic will have to start to simmer down, because your brain sees what you’re looking for. You’ll begin to feel more competent as you continue to acknowledge your own successes. Then, voila! You’ll believe that you have the ability to succeed again … and you will!